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Lizhen; twenty
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Friday, August 11, 2006, 11:48 PM
freaked.
again ms leow chided me for not being able to answer her question today.and she assumed that i'm gonna get retained.
IM REALLY REALLY SCARED! =/
i know i'm lagging.
so no more outings after today.
but still, thanks to my classmates for defending me time and again.
I WANNA STUDY.
sounds like a freak, but yeah, i wanna do well and not get retained.
oh btw.
IM OK WITH TEACHERS SCOLDING ME K. IM NOT GONNA CRY.
anyway its really my fault.
sick of all the consoling thing.
make me feel so useless la.
smt i think i'm calm to the extend of being indifferent.
it puzzles and scares me why i'm this way either.
like yaqin told me that she has this friend who actually forgot the bday of her best friend of many years.
and she gave this very shocked look.
i simply went oh.
and i don't really think comedys are that funny.
i get this feeling that i'm nt laughing because its really funny.
its always like that when i watch comedys.
or maybe its because i can't really catch what they're saying due to their accent.
and fireworks too.
i don't really think they're that fascinating.
no big deal is the feeling i get.
maybe they're too shortlived.
and not like its as rare as once in a hundred years kinda thing.
anyway, i'm still thankful for all the concern and consoling. at least they care in some way.
parents can be so discouraging smt.
all those talk abt follow your dreams and pursue what you like is like crap to them.
and no matter how u try, you just can't convince them.
i so wish my bro can go for the DSA audition thingy.
i really hope he makes it to anglican high :)
in the end his friend can't make it.
and he gave up on the idea.
i can feel the disappointment in my bro even though he doesn't say it.
my life's a mess.
i need to get it straight.
its best to stay away from the com from now.
i hope this is the last time i'm gonna say this xD
i'm really freaked out at the thought of retention.