every beat of my heart

I’ve been traveling a lot here and there and making phone calls to get things done ever since my contract ended and I’m getting so sick of it.
But at least things are halfway there and I could probably start work this coming week.
I still need to head down to SIM tmr moning and RELC on sat.
I hope that will be the last of all the long distance traveling.
And also my mum’s nagging.
I don’t understand why she keeps nagging at me ever since my A’s ended.
And she didn’t nag at my sis to make more money, get an admin job, blah blah.
It’s so unfair because her nagging makes me stressed up and frustrated.
It makes me want to give up communicating with her totally.
Now I know better than to share things with her.
I know what I need to do and I want to get things done too.
Enough of nagging.

I wonder when bee kim is coming back from China & whether she will contact me when she’s back as promised.
And hopefully she’s fit & healthy.

The problem with me is that I think about people more often than they know because I do nothing about it.
I’m afraid of losing the people I know but I always tell myself I can do these things later.
Like after I’m done with my stuffs etc.
But the thing is we all have never ending things to do, lol.
Awkwardness is another concern because sometimes I need time to warm up and I am seldom talkative.
I can’t be asking people out and don’t talk much.
Sometimes I’m deterred by how I feel people think about me because I trust my feelings.
Oh god.
I’m making something as simple as asking others out so complicated, lol.
And my late reply to sms-es.
I should get rid of my laziness.
Get going girl!

HAHA.